


The One Where It's Jared's Fault

by juice817, semaphoredrivethru



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-02 00:23:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6542821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juice817/pseuds/juice817, https://archiveofourown.org/users/semaphoredrivethru/pseuds/semaphoredrivethru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exaggerated drunkenness and unsafe driving practices.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The One Where It's Jared's Fault

**Author's Note:**

> Written in 2008

"God, Jared, would you knock it the fuck _off_?" Jensen growled the words directly in Jared's ear, the only way to ensure Jay would even be able to hear him over the noise at the bar. "How many times do I have to remind you? You. Tube." Jensen shifted and tried discreetly to adjust himself under the cover of the table, only to find himself in a sort of tug-of-war with Jared's fingers for access to his crotch. "I know you are _not_ that drunk."

"No, I'm not," Jared said in his ear, breathing heavily on Jensen's neck. "But I'm having fun." He pulled back, grinning as he let go of Jensen's crotch, and threw an arm over Jensen's shoulders. Just a couple of buddies, out for a few drinks.

Completely unable to help himself, Jensen leaned into Jared, savoring the solid warmth and strength in the only way he could. At least in public. He shook his head in exasperation - at himself, at Jared, at the whole damn homophobic world - and knocked back the last of his beer. He wasn't that drunk yet either, and refused to get maudlin this early in the evening. "Have a little more family-rated fun, please. I like my job." 

"I like my job, too," Jared said, his hand squeezing Jensen's shoulder as he pressed their thighs together. They both knew there were limits to how far they could take this kind of game, but damned if Jared didn't seem determined to push those limits tonight. Jared turned his head to murmur directly in Jensen's ear, his hot breath ghosting over him. "But I'd be happier right now if I could just take you out back and fuck you blind."

Jensen's hand convulsed around the bottle so hard he was briefly afraid he'd break it. He set it carefully on the table. "Then why are we here, Jared?" He turned his head toward Jared, nodded and smiled casually at the crew members who had just walked in and waved. "Why aren't we somewhere that that's actually a possibility?"

Jared smirked and slumped against Jensen, like he'd had way more to drink than what he actually had. It left him pressing his forehead against Jensen's temple, lips brushing his ear. "Because I like to watch you squirm," he said, and there might have been an actual kiss in there, but then Jared was gone, sprawling in his half of the booth, hand under the table but on his own leg for the time being.

"I am perfectly capable of cockblocking you." Jensen flashed Jared a smile as he pushed out of the booth and went to the bar for another round. Jared was still sprawled back in his corner when Jensen returned, draining the last of his beer just as Jensen handed him a new one. "So decide how much you actually like it, Jay."

"Aw, Jen," Jared said, pouting for a half second until Jensen sat next to him again. He slipped his hand on Jensen's knee, but didn't move it up just yet. "Don't be like that. You know I'll make you feel so good later. Make you shout. Make you beg me to spread you out over my bed and fuck you nice and slow and deep. Or maybe fast and hard, if you're hot enough for me by the time we get home. But you _know_ I'll make it good, Jen. Teasing's no fun if you don't follow through."

Jensen swallowed hard, but managed a grin that only Jared could tell was strained. He sipped at the beer and leaned toward Jared. "Isn't it more fun if I squirm under your hands? If we're both naked, if I can touch your cock. If you can put your fingers in my ass."

Jared shifted and used his free hand to tug at his jeans, but didn't drop the teasing smirk from his face. "You know it is," he said in a deep voice that only Jensen ever got to hear. "And you know I'll get that later, too. I know how much you want my hands all over you, Jen. How much you want me to spread you wide and fuck you hard, touching you everywhere, jacking you off, grabbing your hair, marking you as mine. I've seen you beg for it again and again, seen you roll over for me, give me what's mine."

"I'm not the only one who begs, asshole," Jensen muttered. He took a long pull off the beer but it didn't really help when his throat was _so_ dry and his dick _so_ hard. "Man, are we really doing this? Wouldn't you rather go home? We have beer at home, and it's better and cheaper, too. And lube. We have lube. And no audience." Jensen could hear the almost-whine in his voice and knew he'd be embarrassed over it later, when he had some blood in his upstairs brain again. He couldn't bring himself to care right now. "C'mon, Jay, let's go home."

"You know I give you what you want," Jared said in that same voice, his hand sliding halfway up Jensen's thigh and stopping. Jared let it rest there as he drank slowly from his beer, and then leaned in, with a broad grin that only Jensen knew was fake. "All you have to do is ask me. Real pretty."

Jensen turned his head to whisper low in Jared's ear. "Jay, baby. Please. Will you come home with me right now and fuck me until I can't walk?" He reached under the table to grab Jared's hand, drag it up over his dick. He pressed their hands down hard, pushed his hips up just a little. "Strip me down and spread me out. Let me ride your cock."

Jared squeezed Jensen's cock. "So pretty," he murmured. "Let's go. But you're going to have to drive, Jen. Half the people here think I'm stumbling drunk."

"If they knew you any better, they'd know you're always stumbling, drunk or not." Jensen hissed in a breath through his teeth as Jared squeezed again, then he pried Jared's hand away from his body and slid out of the booth. Bending forward, he smiled big at Jared. "Give me the keys and let's get the hell out of here. I want to suck you off."

"Fuck yes," Jared said, roughly handing the keys to Jensen. Still in the shadows of the booth, Jared's eyes were dark and intense and his jaw was tight with want. As soon as he slid out of the booth, though, his face relaxed and he leaned heavily on Jensen, coping a feel of his ass in the process. "Let's go home, Jen. Put you to bed."

Jensen grunted as Jared let him essentially carry his weight. "They better not have any more sex scenes planned for you," he muttered. "You beef up any more and I won't be able to help you when you're _drunk_." Jared grumbled something back at him, but Jensen ignored him in favor of manhandling him a little more roughly than strictly necessary as they made their way out of the bar and across the parking lot to the pickup. He helped Jared into the passenger seat, making a big deal out of getting him settled and strapped in. In sharp contrast to the exaggerated motions he used on Jared's seat belt, the slow stroke and squeeze of his fingers over Jared's dick was small and unnoticeable to anyone watching. Jared, however, sucked in a breath, and Jensen smirked at him as he stepped back and shut the door.

By the time Jensen got into the truck, Jared was already sitting up normally, watching him intently. "Real cute, asshole," he said, although amusement was clear in his voice. "That's my job, remember?"

"Your job?" Jensen cocked an eyebrow at Jared and turned the key in the ignition, letting the engine idle for a few seconds while he put his own seat belt on. "What, being an asshole?" Buckled in, Jensen fought a grin as he put the truck in gear and pulled out of the parking lot, much more relaxed now they were alone and headed home. Not that he minded going out, especially not out with Jared, but Jared was in a flirty mood and Jensen didn't really care for the idea of coming out over the internet because Jared couldn't keep his hands to himself.

"No," Jared said, sliding across the bench seat as far as the seatbelt would let him go as Jensen drove them away. He put his hand on Jensen's thigh and slid it up high, stopping just shy of his dick. "I mean the teasing."

Jensen let his hand fall to cover Jared's, moving it that last very necessary inch and slouching down to spread his legs a bit. Jared's hand was huge and needed plenty of room. Jensen's sigh was at least partly relief. Sometimes he was afraid he was actually addicted to having Jared's hands on him. "I'm not allowed to tease?"

"Not tonight," Jared said, a smirk teasing at his lips as he squeezed Jensen through his jeans, and then popped the buttons of Jensen's fly with quick flicks of his wrist. Reaching in, Jared paused when he found that Jensen wasn't wearing any underwear. "Tease," he breathed, and then pulled Jensen's cock out, stroking him slowly, lightly, easing up when Jensen jerked the wheel a bit too much.

"I'm a little too familiar with your brand of follow through and I am not interesting in having you ruin another pair of my boxers." Jensen sucked air through his teeth as Jared squeezed. "And if you make me crash I will totally kill you, dude." 

Jared laughed at that. "I'm pretty sure not even road head would keep you from getting us home to fuck," he said, tightening his hand and twisting his wrist. "God, Jen, want to fuck you. Want to get inside you; my cock, my hands, my tongue. Want to taste you, feel, you. Only want you, Jen. You know that, don't you? Only you."

With a groan, Jensen pressed his head back against the headrest and reached to tangle a hand in Jared's hair. "I know," he rasped, fighting to keep his eyes open and on the road, to keep from jumping Jared right there, driving or not. "God, I know. Me too."

"Got you," Jared crooned, still stuck in his seat across the cab. "Easy, Jen. Got you." He pumped Jen with steady strokes, knowing everything that drove him crazy, but still holding back - probably a good thing, all things considered. "Almost home, and then I'll fuck you real good. I promise. I'm gonna make you feel so good, babe."

"Always do." Jensen shot him a shaky grin, tugged on his hair and then let go to grip the wheel with both hands. "You know, we could get there faster if you took your hand off my dick. Just sayin'."

"But I'm having fun," Jared said. He let go of Jensen's cock, though, and leaned back in his own seat. The sound of a zipper sliding down rasped loudly in the cab of the truck, and Jared hummed low and rough in the back of his throat. "Guess I'll just have to keep myself busy, huh?"

Jensen snorted, but the truck nearly leapt forward as Jensen's foot sank down on the gas pedal. "Yeah. Because that is completely not at all distracting, you with your hand down your pants. I'm starting to think you actually get off on this shit, Jay."

"Ya think?" Jared grunted, shifting in his seat and spreading his legs. "Faster, Jen."

"Yeah, it would be _awesome_ to get pulled over with our dicks hanging out." Jensen watched the speedometer closely, riding just over the speed limit, trying to get home as fast as he safely and legally could. Because the only thing better than a clip on YouTube of them kissing would be a police report mentioning their state of undress on the public record. "You'd better not come before we get home. I want you to actually fuck me, not just jerk me off."

Jared laughed and zipped himself back up again. "No sense of adventure, Jen," he said, but leaned over to tuck Jensen back into his jeans anyhow. "But since I figure you won't let me fuck you in a police station..." His fingers lingered on Jensen's crotch, touching way more than necessary, squeezing him through the denim like he had back at the bar. Not that Jensen was complaining.

Jensen shifted his legs apart as much as he could and still keep his foot on the gas. "I totally have an awesome sense of adventure. It just happens to be paired with a sense of decorum. And _appropriateness_. Which you completely lack." He groaned, grit his teeth and gave in, flooring the pedal. "I am not going to let you fuck me anywhere that there are no closed spaces with locks. And barred cells do not count as closed, so ixnay on the police station."

"I have those," Jared said, still leaning over as far as his seatbelt would allow, nosing at Jensen's neck, kissing him. "I just don't bother using them when you've got that totally under control for the both of us. Lets me be the fun one, gives me a chance to get you wound tight and begging and so fucking hot for me that you might let me fuck you in the back of the truck if it meant you could finally get my cock in you, my hands on you. Love to get you all worked up, so pretty and so desperate for it."

"Only," Jensen gritted out through clenched teeth, "if we're in the garage with the doors shut." Okay, so maybe if it were a deserted field or something, but there was no way he'd actually tell Jared that. Jared had far too much confidence and far too damn much _power_ over him already. Fuck. Jensen pried his fingers away from the wheel and reached over to fumble with Jared's seat belt. Popping the buckle awkwardly, he let his fingers follow the retracting metal clasp as it slid over Jared's lap, then pushed his hand between Jared's legs. "Get over here, dammit."

Sliding across the short space between them on the bench seat, Jared spread his legs, giving Jensen plenty of room. They were almost home, thank fucking _god_. Jared's big hand, hot and heavy, pressed harder against Jensen's dick, grinding against him, and his mouth latched on to Jensen's neck licking, sucking, nibbling, and all of it just shy of enough to leave marks. Marks had to stay below the collar, that was the rule, one even Jared wouldn't break.

"Want you naked," Jared rumbled in Jensen's ear, with an extra squeeze to make his point.

Jensen turned onto their street with a squeal of tires, taking the turn too fast and not giving a damn. He squeezed Jared through his jeans, lifted his hips into Jared's hand. "Want to be naked. Want you to fuck me, Jay." He tilted his head and dropped his shoulder so Jared had all the room he needed to mouth over the length of his neck. "Make me scream."

They were half a block away from their house, so Jared reached up to hit the button for the garage door. "I'm gonna," he promised on a groan, mouth open and panting. "God, want to kiss you so badly. I have since the second we walked into the bar. Want to kiss you, touch you..."

"God, Jared, why did we even go to the bar? Why didn't we just stay home and have sex?' Jensen pulled into the garage and slammed the truck into park before it completely stopped, had his seat belt off and his hands in Jared's hair before the truck stopped rocking. "You make me so fucking crazy, all the time."

"You know you love it," Jared said, hand flailing for a few seconds before the garage door rumbled shut behind them. He grabbed Jensen before the door was even half-closed, pulling him in for a hard, desperate kiss, invading Jensen's mouth with a growl, hands yanking at Jensen's clothes only to stop long enough to pull a condom and a small tube of lube out of his pocket. "Here," Jared ordered roughly, kissing Jensen again.

Jensen shoved his hand into Jared's pants, curled his fingers roughly around Jared's dick. "Now," he agreed. He fumbled with his own jeans with one hand, refusing to let go of Jared or to stop kissing him. He shifted, rocking slightly side to side as he worked the jeans down. "C'mon, Jay, need something. Anything. Fuck me, please!"

Jared pulled away, hands dragging over the smooth skin of Jensen's hips. "Naked," he rumbled, and then grabbed the back of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head. "Get naked for me, Jen," he said, shimmying out of his own jeans, watching Jensen do the same. "Gonna fuck you here, just a few feet from the sidewalk."

"Don't remind me, or I'll make you wait until we get into the house." Jensen swore at his jeans when they got tangled in his shoes but finally got the mess of fabric and leather over his feet and onto the floor of the truck. Still in shirts and socks, he climbed over Jared and straddled his legs, knees digging into the leather on either side of Jared's hips. He grabbed Jared's face with both hands and dragged him into a kiss. "Fucking hell, Jay."

Still kicking off his shoes and jeans, Jared slid one big hand up Jensen's muscular back to cradle the back of his head, pulling him down into a deeper kiss. He shifted, cock rubbing at the cleft of Jensen's ass as they moved together. Finally, Jared broke the kiss, mouthing down Jensen's neck. He tugged the collar of Jensen's t-shirt out of the way and kissed Jensen's collarbone, and then bit him, sucking hard, leaving a deliberate mark as he rocked up into Jensen.

"Taste so fucking good, Jen," Jared growled, biting again and pressing a lubed finger against Jensen's ass.

Jensen let his head fall back as he sank down on Jared's finger, hips making small circles as he tried to coax Jared into doing _something_ more. Jared obliged with a second finger, and Jen tangled his hands in Jared's hair again, tugged. "C'mon, I'm good. Been teasing me all fucking night, 'm ready, just - god. What are you waiting for, seriously?"

"Babe, I'll _hurt_ you," Jared groaned, adding another finger. "Wanna mark you, wanna make you scream, but in a good way. Never want to hurt you, Jen."

"Fine," Jensen growled, "whatever. Just - _fuck_ \- just hurry. I know you like having your fingers in my ass, but we've been doing this awhile. Doesn't take that long any more."

Jared pulled his fingers out of Jensen with a slow drag and one hard push against his prostate. "Such a fucking pushy bottom when you were begging me to make it all better back in the bar." There was the sound of foil tearing, and Jared grunted, finally pushing his dick against Jensen. "You sure?" he asked once, voice soft.

Reaching back, Jensen wrapped his hand around Jared's dick to guide it into place. "You're the one who got me all worked up. You can damn well follow through." He settled back and let his weight help push Jared just inside. He hissed and dropped his forehead to Jared's shoulder. "'m always pushy, doesn't matter who's fucking who."

" _F-fuck_ ," Jared groaned, one hand coming up from behind to curve heavy and strong over Jensen's shoulder. The other gripped tight at Jensen's waist, guiding him as they moved together. "Y'know I love it when you're pushy. Almost as much as when you're squirming and begging for it."

"You ever gonna be pushy back?" Jensen murmured the words against Jared's neck, chased them with his tongue. He could taste the sheen of sweat that covered warm skin, and moaned softly. "Or you don't care, long as you get laid?" His teeth nipped at the juncture of shoulder and neck. "God, you're huge."

Jared growled roughly, twisting them until Jensen's back slammed against the bench seat, the truck rocking with the move. "Want me to be pushy?" he said, hitching up Jensen's hips and thrusting in slow and deep and then fucking holding _still_. "You want me to take charge, Jen?" He wrapped one big hand around Jensen's cock, squeezing rhythmically but not stroking. Jared's eyes were glittering in the garage lights, a muscle on the side of his jaw jumping as he looked down at Jensen. "You're fucking mine, Jen. And one of these days I'm going to get you so worked up you'll actually let me fuck you somewhere public. You'll let me because you're mine, because you'll want it that bad, won't you?"

Jensen made several completely incoherent noises, gasping for air and trying like hell to force Jared to move, but he had no leverage and the fucker was just too solid. "Yours," he finally said, voice completely strangled. "Fuck, I - nngh - I'd like to see you try. Sex is _private_."

"True," Jared said, pumping his hand up and down once as he shifted, pulling back and thrusting in again. "Don't want anyone to see you like this but me. Ever. Drive me fucking crazy, Jen."

"I've noticed. Move, dammit. Stop talking and fuck me." Jensen dug his fingers into Jared's biceps and lifted his hips into Jared's next thrust. "Hard and fast." He grinned. "You might have to carry me to bed."

"Only if you're... fuck... only if you're good," Jared said, and then fucking _finally_ started moving, giving Jensen exactly what he wanted, what he'd been asking for. Hard and fast and deep, both hands on Jensen's sides, his hips, his chest, shoving his shirts up, out of the way, touching him fucking everywhere as he pounded again and again, looming over Jensen, larger than life. " _So good_."

Jensen wrapped his legs around Jared's hips and moved with him, pushing back hard into each thrust. He groaned at the solid feel of Jared inside him, under his hands. His fingers clenched convulsively but there was no give in the muscles, and Jensen shivered. "Always good, Jay. I'm always good. And you, god. Just like that, s'perfect."

Jared's fingers dug into Jensen's skin as he lifted Jensen enough to change the angle but not enough to screw up the perfect rhythm he'd found. His eyes were barely open at all now, but he still didn't look away from Jensen. "Jen..." he growled.

"Jay." Jensen smoothed his hands up Jared's arms and over his shoulders and then cupped his face, holding Jared's gaze with an effort. He wanted to close his eyes and _feel_ , but the glitter of Jared's eyes through his lashes held him fast. Jensen fought the urge to say the stupid sappy things that always bubbled just under the surface with Jared. They weren't like that. He couldn't stop the grunts forced out of him with each hard thrust, though he clenched his jaw against them.

Finally, Jared let his eyes close and pressed his forehead to Jensen's even as he kept moving, face going slack with mindless pleasure. "No one like this," he gasped, head dropping lower so he could pant against Jensen's neck. "Fucking addictive." He shuddered and froze for a long second, and then started moving again, this time palming Jensen's dick between them, stroking him, pulling him. "C'mon. Give it to me."

Jensen wrapped one arm around the back of Jared's neck to hold him close, the other hand dropping to grip the side of the seat, fingers working rhythmically. "Yours. God, Jay, _please_." Jared did something obscenely good then, some - knowing Jared, accidentally - coordinated twist of hips and wrist that had Jensen's head slamming back, eyes and mouth flying open as his entire body stiffened with the rush of pleasure.

"Oh _god_ ," Jared moaned, hips stuttering as Jensen's orgasm hit. But he kept moving, stroking, pulling it out of Jensen in long, hard strokes, groaning nonsense against Jensen's sweaty skin. "Jen... Ah!" Jared cried out, tensing, back bowing, shuddering as he came too, head suddenly lifting and eyes wide and sightless.

"Jay," Jensen said again, "god, Jay." Jensen cupped Jared's jaw again, brought their mouths together, not so much a kiss as a sharing of air as they gradually calmed. Finally Jensen shifted, pressing his cheek to Jared's and letting his legs fall away from Jared's hips. He swallowed and grinned. "I'm totally making you carry me in, jackass."

"Aww, it's a bit late for me to carry you over the threshold, don't you think?" Jared whined, kissing the spot just under Jensen's ear gently. "You make me crazy about you, you know," he added in a soft whisper that would barely be heard, even that close.

Jensen coaxed Jared back enough to meet his eyes. "You were already crazy, Jay," he murmured, but his tone was soft and his thumb brushed slowly over Jared's bottom lip. He replaced his thumb with his mouth. "We are too damn old for car sex."

Jared laughed, that grin pressed right up against Jensen's mouth. "You're the one who wanted to wait 'till we got home," he said. 

"We aren't _home_ ," Jensen laughed, "we're in the fucking _truck_." He kissed Jared again, completely unable to stop himself from tasting the laughter still spilling from Jared's mouth. "This one's your fault, don't even try to pin it on me."

"Dude, taking credit for awesome sex? Not a problem," Jared said, kissing Jensen once more before pulling back and out with a soft grunt. "Besides, we managed our private property and a locked door. I'd say that qualifies as home."

Jensen shoved Jared's shoulder and sat up with a wince. "You're so full of shit. I don't know why I put up with you." Instead of grabbing his jeans he grabbed Jared and kissed him hard and quick. "Was gonna suggest a second round when we actually got home, but if we're already there..." Jensen let his voice trail off and shrugged, then shot Jared a wicked smile. "Your loss."

"Don't be like that, Jen," Jared coaxed, almost pouting. The effect was totally ruined, though, by the way his eyes danced with amusement. "There's always room for seconds."

"You would know," Jensen said dryly. "You're usually up for thirds or fourths." Jensen bit back a groan as he reached for his jeans and tugged them on. "God, getting old sucks. My back may make the decision for us."

Jared reached over, rubbing the middle of Jensen's back with one large hand. "C'mon, old man," he said, still rubbing. "Let's get inside, where there's a real bed, plenty of beer, and two dogs that watch us fuck. It's not the honeymoon suite, but it's better than back cramps."

Jensen leaned into the touch, ducking his head to hide the sappy expression he couldn't wipe off his face. "Aww, baby. You do love me. And you're totally giving me a back rub when we get to that real bed." He'd tried for sarcastic, but wasn't sure he didn't sound just as whipped for Jared as Jared had sounded for him. But if it was mutual, maybe that was okay.

There was a long pause, and then Jared said, softly, "Yeah." Then he cleared his throat and pulled on his jeans quickly, wadding up the tied-off condom in a handful of fast food napkins. "Yeah, you know me," he said, tugging on his t-shirt again. "Any excuse to get my hands on you is a good one."

"I can totally get behind that," Jensen said. He grabbed a fistful of Jared's t-shirt and pulled him into another kiss. Hand still clenched in Jared's shirt, Jensen pulled back and studied Jared's face for several seconds. The words when they came were somewhere between a question and a statement. "We're really doing this."

For a second there, it looked like Jared was going to crack another joke, but then his face sobered, and he brushed his thumb across Jensen's lower lip. "Looks like it," he said, lips quirked ever so slightly. "Works for me."

Jensen nodded, suddenly breathless. "Okay. Okay." He let go of Jared's shirt and managed a smile. Although a little shaky, it felt good as it spread across his face. Right. "Me too." He grabbed his shoes and climbed out of the truck, throwing a smirk at Jared over his shoulder. "Totally your fault."

Jared just sat there for a second, and when understanding dawned, he grinned, huge and happy and so very alive and _Jared_ that the garage felt too small to contain it. He grabbed his shoes and climbed out of the truck, slinging an arm over Jensen's shoulders. 

"Awesome," he said, still grinning. "I think I like it when it's my fault."

Letting himself lean into Jared's body, Jensen ducked his head and smiled. _Me too._


End file.
